California Anticipates Return Of Its State Monument: The San Oonfre Beach Boobs

It’s been about nine months since California’s most iconic and cherished landmark, the giant nuclear boobs of San Onofre, stopped producing their sweet mothers milk of nuclear energy, after some paranoid “safety worker” became afraid of a possible tube leak.

But happy days are here again – Southern California Edison has filed a proposal with the Nuclear Energy Commission to start up one of the boobs.

Tree-huggers, who no doubt lack the appreciate of massive, concrete boobs overlooking a glistening Southern California Ocean, are against the plan to reopen the power plant. According to the Times:


Critics decried the proposal to fire Unit 2 back up as a dangerous gamble, saying it’s not clear that running the unit at reduced power will prevent the conditions that caused the tube wear, as Edison and a team of experts from other companies concluded.

“I just don’t believe it’s appropriate to treat Southern California as a science experiment,” said Arnie Gundersen, a consultant to environmental group Friends of the Earth, which has adamantly opposed plans to restart the plant.

Mr. Gunderson, if you’ve got a better state to treat as a science experiment, we’d love to hear it. In the meantime, take your breast-hating science to a state that’s too afraid unleash the power of nuclear jugs.

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